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Picture of Blue Razzzzzzzzz

Blue Razzzzzzzzz

$18.15
Pack Size

For this flavor we were inspired by those delicious Blue Razz popsicles we used to have during summer back in the day. Just because we’re paying taxes now doesn’t mean we can’t enjoy that beautiful taste. Extra 10% off if you know why we put 9 Z’s in the flavor name (just kidding we're broke, but if you do know you're awesome).

Picture of Legally Ambiguous Pink Candy

Legally Ambiguous Pink Candy

$18.15
Pack Size

We actually had a name for this seltzer that was much closer to the candy it tastes like, but our lawyers absolutely lost their shit. 

 

Apparently ripping off a candy’s flavor is a big deal. In our eyes, we’re just paying homage to this delicious Pink Candy. Either way, give it a shot and see if you can guess which one we were going for. FYI, it's not Cotton Candy that would be gross.

Picture of Midnight Shirley

Midnight Shirley

$18.15
Pack Size

Why is a Shirley Temple a non-alcoholic drink? Can someone answer that? Well, whatever. We fixed the problem.

 

Oh, and If this is the legal estate of Shirley Temple you can fuck right off, you’re not getting a dime. You don’t own the word Shirley.

Picture of Ménage á Orange

Ménage á Orange

$18.15
Pack Size

We get the most questions about why this one is called Ménage Á Orange. The answer is simple: imagine all those delicious orangey flavors like tangerine, peach, mango and orange partying in your mouth. But with classy French accents.

Picture of  IT'S JUST BEER

IT'S JUST BEER

$19.99
Pack Size

This isn't some sloopy doop double IPA or a Pineapple infused sour aged 10 years in a van down by the river.

 

This is a beer.

 

Open it, give it a nice refreshing sip and you'll be like "Yep, that's definitely beer". Feet to the fire, it's technically an American Lager, which like, how cool is that? Definitely the most patriotic of the lagers.